You make me crazy when…

You make plans to come over on Friday night to drink wine and gossip with me, and then you don’t show up. You owe me $20 for wine and cheese.

Broke as…Fannie Mae

Poor Fannie Mae. And poor Freddie Mac. All everyone’s talking about is how broke they are, and what a crisis they’re in, and I’m thinking, Dude, can they pay the rent on their buildings? Probably. It’s not so bad. I wanted to buy a rug for my carport-turned-patio today, but then I remembered that we’re giving my MIL a 70th birthday dinner at Fearrington for $250 a pop. And that’s not her present. Don’t get me wrong – I think 70 is great, and I think my MIL turning 70 is great. But last time I checked, the money tree in my backyard has yet to sprout. What do you get someone who’s turning 70? Should I buy her the outdoor rug I wanted, say Oops, that was for ME! Just kidding! and call it a day? Not so much.

The thing is, my dad came over last night and gave us this big long speech about not keeping up with the Joneses, how we should be satisfied with what we have, and how, in the overall grand scheme of things, we’re really fortunate to live where we live and have what we have. I completely agree. But it scared me. He was talking about saving every penny we can for our (as yet undetermined and therefore non-existent) children’s education, our retirement, etc. And we don’t so much do that. I mean, yeah, BB has a 401k, and I have a retirement plan with the state and all that, but we don’t have a rainy day fund. Like if we both lost our jobs on Monday (my hands are shaking as I type this because it is THAT scary) we’d be completely shit out of luck.

Why does money scare me? Why do I feel like if I sweep the bills and statements under the rug, unopened, they never existed in the first place? Finances are one of those things that you have to work at, I guess, like a job around the house or an exercise plan, God forbid. And that’s where I have no staying power. I’m good at balancing the checkbook for like two weeks at the time, and then after that? Forget it. And then I get so overwhelmed with the stacks and stacks of receipts and bills and check stubs that I think, oh hell no, I don’t have time for that.

But the reality is, I need to make time. I need to consciously decide to take an active role in our finances, because if I don’t, we’ll be as broke as Fannie Mae, and I don’t want my name splashed all over ABC World News at 6:30. I’m just saying…